Some Assistance Please?

Can some of you lovely gentlemen readers out there shed some light on this male behavior pattern?  Boy meets girl.  Boy and girl go out on a date, spend several hours having interesting conversations, making connections, laughing, sharing stories.  Boy and girl part ways.  Boy calls/emails girl the following day and says something like, "I had a great time -- are you free next week?" or "You remember we talked last night about Corner Bistro -- I've never been, do you want to go?"  "Sure," says girl, and tosses out some dates in the near future.  Boy disappears, never to be heard from again. 

Explain this if you can, as I am completely and utterly befuddled.  Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.

Comments

[zoot]

3 words:
Short attention span

It's definitely not a male-only behavior, though.

[m#1]

Probably got hit by a cross-town bus...what other reason could there possibly be?

[david]

Well I had a really stupid relationship a decade or so ago that started with dinner at the Corner Bistro - maybe he heard it was jinxed and didn't want to risk it.

Good burgers though.

Either that or he's a jerk and you lucked out.

[zoot]

I have to concur - his loss, your gain.

[Sisyphus]

Would not read too much into it. People go "dark" for numerous reasons that have nothing to do with the other party. I must say, however, that if he did initiate the call after the date, that behaviour is from some one who is definitely immature.

[Suzy Loo]

Oh I’ve been on a few of those!!!

Basically in his mind he wants a relationship. He dates you and you both get along so well and everything is great.

For some unknown reason he is suddenly paralyzed by fear. Fear of those last 3 relationship that ended badly, fear that he has a small penis, fear that he you might be just too good for him, fear that maybe he doesn’t want to date and just fool around…

So basically it’s self sabotage that comes after he makes an effort to get serious

Baby, its not you!

Suzy Loo

[Euan]

Seems strange that he suggested going out and you even agreed a date... then he vanishes!

[Laren]

Well, perhaps the most recent guy did, in fact, get hit by a crosstown bus. But what annoys me is that this is the second instance of such behavior this year. What is with these boys?!

[m#1]

that's just it . . .BOYS! Maybe when they grow up to be MEN they might handle themselves better.

[Laren]

Sure -- whenever in the distant future that might be.

[Judgemonkey]

I'm told that what you have to do is say you don't have your diary and that he ring you later with some dates so that the ball is in his court to make the call. That way you arent last in the decision making chain and left hanging on. If he doesn’t ring you know where you stand and you haven’t committed days.

As a guy I have to say I have never rung without the intention of seeing the person again but some guys do that. I also know girls that do that. There are lots of things that are a 'girl’s prerogative'. Turning up late. Not returning calls or just ignoring you outright are just a few

Why is it that a mans prerogative is interpreted as a character flaw?

Still no reason to treat you badly. I hope you find a good bloke soon if that what you want.

[patrick]

Hey i stumbled upon this blog after i started reading gothamist. I guess it's my love of food and guns and roses that drew me here and i've been reading ever since.. great blog.. my thoughts... #1 what guy in nyc hasn't been to the corner bistro and would you want to date that guy? second guys do random crap that will never make sense. it's not always that "he's just not into you" sometimes it's pure laziness. i think i did the a similar thing to my fiance.

[Laren]

Patrick -- excellent point about the Corner Bistro.